Zonkers !

I've been a stressful lil lady lately, I don't know why, I haven't done much in this past few weeks, but maybe that's it, I feel the need to live it up again, & I'm getting anxiety attacks?
Well that sounds just about right

I felt like Chuck lately, or should I say Charlotte in this photo, it explains too much, almost perfectly (except I don't look like that), but i imagine myself in a world where things are quirky and all good, where life and death seems the most inconvenient thing there is. Where you feel like you can't touch anyone, and you feel dead.

But what is worse than that feeling, is when you've been complaining kickin' & screaming about meaningless self inflicted bullsh♥t, that when you wake up the next morning you find out this little girl you never knew, but someone in your family knew is dead. She told her mom she couldn't breathe and was rushed to the hospital, then that little girl had some strange fevers n sickness, and she needs to go to a children's hospital in Long Beach, but there's simply no room. Then that girl passes away the night before from today.
Things like this you can't simply comprehend, the girl is actually not in a physical form waiting to pick fights with her mom, grow up and have a life or the fact not many people can remember who she is. Or even that there's nothing to do but pray to someone or assure the family or give your respects, especially when you do not have a god or do not know the family too well.

And i thank life, for this life I'm living.